Are You A “Jerk Magnet”? Navigating Complicated Relationships

By Andrés Muñoz

In the past number of weeks, I’ve met several people who have had a difficult time with their relationships and seem to attract the same type of person over and over again. While many have had good fortune when choosing a partner, it’s much harder for others.

For them, it might seem that they are “jerk magnets”, unlucky individuals who never “get a break” and must deal with the same social patterns over and over again when it actually goes far beyond mere casualties. There are solid psychological reasons why we choose a specific type of partner and put up with particular kinds of people. But why do we put up with toxic partners and people in general, and what steps can we take to improve the quality of relationships in our lives?

While most of my insights below come from a romantic perspective, many elements can…